Under Pressure ...

Wow. The interim of 'no blogging' has been eventful.  I've been managing ongoing work stress, dealing with ill husband, all the other changes since the end of the Bruce tour holiday in February and on top of all that, some pretty serious issues with Dad's nursing home, and his hospitalisation on Monday.

So one of the nasty side effects of all this stress has been panic attacks. I haven't had any of those in such a long time.  Until the last few weeks. During one incident of being frozen by fears, one thing I have learnt is that I just need a focus to remove myself from the crippling moments of indecision - generally that is something I find through getting another person's input, however the concept of a focus is something I can work on, I know I love the lyrics to The Rising, or I can choose to focus on a simple, trivial decision to remove the stress a little.  If all else fails I need to remember to break any troubles down into one small decision at a time.

What else is putting me under pressure? All the usual things, plus extras in caring for my family, including Dad. How am I dealing with it? One day at a time, one action at a time.

What I need to urgently do is bend my life to re-include time for walking. How I'll manage that when my 3 children all feel they don't get enough of me already between work, tai chi and Dad I don't quite know. Having remembered to continue typing this blog is step one!

One a lighter note, "under Pressure' to also buy Queen tickets, or Eagles tickets... or neither!

Learning curve - communication under pressure!

I've learnt so much from looking after my Dad about people. So so much. I just hope I am able to retain it all, because it takes superhuman patience and a whole shift of attitude / head zone to undertake the delicacy of communication I am managing with 3 different levels of care staff (4 if you count management); doctors, multiplied by the same in the hospital and then random extras like physio and nurse practitioners. By the time I'm done balancing and juggling all of that I'm buggered on a daily basis. Not to mention keeping a lid on wanting to blow my steam when there are not wet wipes or spare underwear in Dads bathroom FFS and I'm helping him by myself!

I'll revisit the details of this another time.