Thank you E Street Band!

This year, almost as soon as Bruce and the E Street band packed their bags and departed our beaches, the world changed for me.

When I saw Bruce Springsteen in 2013, something changed in a massively positive and awesome way for me.  Then, somehow at the end of February this year, having taken an epic 4 week and 9 concert holiday around 5 states of this beautiful land, life just started nosediving.

The theory I like the most is twofold. One, after sooo much Bruce and E Street Band, I felt invincible and instead of taking on only a single thing (my health / weight / fitness), I started tackling ALL THE THINGS. I was like  the blogger who decides to be an adult and CLEAN ALL THE THINGS.  It was taxing. I collapsed under the strain a little bit. This combined with the fact that travelling if not 'with' a huge group of people outside of my normal 'bubble' was a bit of a rude shock. Travelling in such proximity to such a large group for such a long time, certainly threw me for a six on a number of occasions. I was spent before leaving, the tour was to recharge my batteries (which it did), but I found it difficult to take on a whole new group of strangers, I just didn't have the emotional gusto at that time.

And thus, life post tour has been quite odd. Weeks go by when I don't feel any of the empowering inspiration that lingered for so much longer post-2013 concerts. There are days when it all feels like a dream.  

And then there are precious moments like today, when putting my son to bed, when my phone is out of batteries (no Bruce setlist!) and he says to me "But Dad's phone has Dream Baby Dream!" and then "Doesn't Dad have Wrecking Ball?" The cute, it burns.  He fell asleep listening to Cadillac Ranch from a youtube clip of Sydney in the end :)

Which reminded me of just how grateful I am for the E Street Band, so I'm writing this thank you for them.

This was my view of the concert in Adelaide with my beautiful daughter, and delightful friend. We had the most amazing time!

To Eddie, thank you for the down to earth facebook posts, and your sense of humour. Thank you for thanking us in Perth.  Perth was so special for me, I met some wonderful people and you played such a big part in making it all feel lovely.  It was in hindsight quite funny to see you in Sydney, well, to barrel past you with my crazy loud family and not recognise you, not that I could think at all clearly at that point, a common state when running after 3 energetic kids. Next time, please jump in front of me and say "boo!"; I'll keep a lookout for men without saxophones leaping out from behind their beautiful wives. You continue to be an inspiration to me, your posts remind me that hard work is what achieves goals, what keeps us where we want to be in life, my thanks. I am glad that you have visited and enjoyed my country.

To Charlie, thank you for the winks and smiles in Perth, what fun! It makes such a difference to know that we're all having fun together :)

To Soozie, thank you for playing the Violin. You inspire my daughter whenever she sees you onstage.  Thank you for being friendly, for smiling, for not looking crossly in my direction when my poor tired, overheated daughter (same one who cheerfully survived 43 degree heat and insisted on staying up till 12:30 to see Bruce leave in Adelaide, who begged to be allowed to come to Brisbane too!) looked miserable and wilted. Thank you for smiling, not frowning!

Max, thank you for being the incredible backbone of the band. Last year you blew me away and I spent hours watching you mesmerised by the way you work your magic.  And I have a new respect and appreciation for drums, everywhere. You've opened up a whole new way of listening to music for me.

Stevie Van Zandt, thank you for being you. I was only on your side of the stage a few times, but your energy and cheekiness is amazing and so much fun. Thank you most of all for standing with Bruce and singing to my daughter. Thank you for waving to us in Sydney when we were way up behind you.  And thank you for Lillehammer! I have not yet watched it,and look forward to the chance to watch it all!

Roy, you legend. Thank you for every note played, including the ones played with Bruce's head. Thank you so much for the beautiful music.

Everett, thank you for those incredible drum-offs :)

Michelle, Cindy & Curtis oh my thank you for the fun! My girl and I thoroughly enjoyed waving to you during the Sydney show and she loved seeing how you work together at the back of the stage to give us such a wonderful night of music. The waves and smiles made her feel so special, thank you xxxx

Barry, Clark & Curt I love it when you all get to the front of the stage, your sense of fun is infectious, thank you!

Garry, you are such a dark horse hiding quietly behind your bass. Thank you for the moments when your smile lights up the room. 

Nils, like Eddie, you have been and continue to be, such an influence on me as a person. Musically I'm challenged, but your happy outlook, and the incredible vibe from you in 2013 especially made a huge impact on my outlook. Your accessibility to fans as people is incredible. You made me feel welcome on twitter, for which I thank you. I have enjoyed immensely learning from your example on stage and off, and wow, I love watching you play Because the Night. Thank you!

Jake, I have not sufficient words. I came to see the E Street Band for the first time with you already filling those big shoes. I think that not only do you do an amazing job, but you bring a young energy with you. Blessings and thanks!

And Tom, again, for me you are a part of the E Street Band as I know it.  But what a new and exciting influence on amazing.  I love to watch you, the juxaposition of your energy and personal styles with some of not-quite-so-Tom songs! Your face is a picture!  Thank you for standing up for those who need a voice! Thank you for the hours of fun in Perth particularly, your smile is infectious. Thank for for your contribution to The Ghost of Tom Joad, which now makes me cry. 

Bruce Springsteen, thank you for singing to my daughter, so very much. It means so much to her and made my night to see her shine with happiness both in Adelaide and Sydney. Thank you for meeting her, and for the hindsight-object-lesson-in-parenting that sometimes Mums just need to shut up and listen!  That one is going to be a challenge for me.  Thank you for the challenges! Since seeing you in concert for the first time in 2013, my life has changed. You are this person who opened the door into your soul in a concert and who in doing so exposed my own inner self. The magic has rubbed off a little differently this year, but I'm sure it is still there, no excuses to be so sick, no excuses not to exercise, no excuses for not being the best of me in this life. All that matters in the end are our family, our health and the little piece of us we pass along to others through our actions. Have a good time in this life right now, because it is the only one we have! Thank for, and the whole E Street Band for that lesson.

Most of all thank you for the chance to share this experience with my daughter, we have the happiest memories together!  Be warned, next tour my son insists he is coming along too!

Why I wish I hadn't done Bruce in Brisbane

I've reached a certain point now, where at this very moment, I simply wish I had not attended the Brisbane concert at all. Would I be jealous of those who had? Probably yes, especially as almost all the people I know raved about it. However the concert they experienced, was not the same one I attended. For me, the Brisbane concert was the one that quite simply, went wrong. It summed up all that was crappy and shit on the tour of Australia, and did nothing at all to uplift me as every other Springsteen concert has done. 

My reasons why are:

1. Poor queue preparation / outcomes / moods
I really don't think I have the mindset required to enjoy queuing. I hate waiting for one thing. I also hate wasting time, and tension. Queues are filled with all of that and more.  But the Brisbane queue was especially crap, as one of my friends arrived first, then told other people, then they said 'just go home till tomorrow' and then the 2nd group of people turned up, apparently took over number 1&2 spot from 2 other people and then eventually because I was parked in my car with nothing else to do for the afternoon I ended up getting number 9 & 10 spot with my daughter. This soon turned into 7 & 8 when two people dropped out. This should have made us happy, but because of the tension (I assume from the above confusion between everyone with a higher number than us) it just made me uncomfortable. I was alone with my girl with a very good number but with no immediate prospect of being near any friendly faces who would assist me in ensuring my girl's safety in the pit.  I didn't really want to have such low numbers with her, without also having along another adult beside us who was as committed to safety as I was.  This tension stayed with me for the 3 days of queuing. 

2. My beautiful daughter. 
Who convinced me to do just one more show.  I do not regret taking her, not a bit, but there were many moments when I questioned my decisions & hers.  We had a pact that because she was going to be at the front, no sooking or getting tired (she had managed 2 concerts already in fine form so I didn't foresee how this could happen!) What I didn't think ahead to was what I would do if she couldn't keep her side of the bargain (nobody is perfect!) I should have had a plan B!!!! So what went wrong?  Quite a bit. Because we now had tour shirts post-Sydney, and the ladies in the Brisvegas Bruce house were dressing up, she wanted to join into that fun. Great, except that her previous concert attire was far more suited to long hours standing in a sweat box! She went from very cool loose summer clothes to leggings and a hot Born in the USA T-Shirt in the hope of getting onstage for Sunny Day, the song Bruce always sings with a child from the audience. We also ended up in a group of people who did not approve of her presence in the audience, and were not afraid to say so. We were blessed by one lovely lady who stood her ground behind my daughter and protected her from the worst shoving crowd I've experienced at Springsteen (another thing that went wrong with having brought her along to this particular concert) But there's more. The heat. It was worse than Adelaide, which was bad enough that a woman fainted with heatstroke beside us. So much hotter. And my 9 year old was wearing her hot leggings and t-shirt. So she really wasn't having fun. And it showed to everyone that she was melting, although I was slow to catch on, and only realised towards the end of the encores that she really was feeling the heat, and not just hating the music.  Which is the final disaster in her experience (well almost). So the Wild, The Innocent and the E Street Shuffle did not appeal to her. She wanted the Rock n Roll Bruce show. Hunter Valley 1 would have been right up her alleyway. Brisbane was not. How much of this was affected by the loud shouting directly at her that "she shouldn't even be here anyway" during the opening song I don't know.

I feel better for having vented. There are other, small things that upset me about Brisbane. Some not so small. Despite all this negative writing, I am from this point on going to always focus on the positives I can take out of the experience of the show. These were:

1. Seeing my friend's eyes light up at hearing the sound check played, and not long later at hearing her favourite song "Does this Bus Stop at 82nd Street?"

2. Seeing a lovely young woman in happy tears on her Birthday after meeting Bruce and speaking with him after the concert. 

3. Seeing Gary Tallent with a Tuba  (that's a poor picture of it there! But so funny :)




















4. Remembering all the good times I'd had through the whole tour, and the people who made the experience so special. 

And now I'm done. I can look back on this and laugh, as Garfield has said in cartoons past about terrible mishaps.  

This entire post was inspired by reading 7 Ways to Let go of Insults from an A*Hole 

A great way to enlist help with organising - 'helpx'

We had an exciting 'first' this week. Our first HelpX (help exchange) visitor!  Martin from Denmark, came to us on Monday and left for a trip to Australia Zoo this morning.

It was altogether a very enjoyable experience, we were blessed with a relaxed, independent and polite visitor who fitted in around the family and helped out easily.

We really enjoyed providing him with some Australian 'firsts' too.

This is Martin's first Vegemite experience, although we buy Aussie products so it's actually a Mighty Mite on toast brekkie :)


And below is his first Pavlova.  For those (including Martin) who want a brief history of the dessert, here's the wiki. 

 

 



The premise behind HelpX is to exchange food and a place to sleep for around 4 hours work per day's stay. We found ourselves not getting into 4 hours work simply because 2 little children were completely entranced and demanded attention from our visitor (counts as work to me). This turned out ok, as I had a little more time to do things of my own and some help with supervision. We also enjoyed the educational experience of learning about another country, the similarlities and differences.

 

Tonight was sadly the meltdown of tired children and tired adults, we all felt a bit grumpier,  but overall the tired flaking out hasn't diminished the positive experience that helpx brought to us.

 

We certainly look forward to more helpx experiences and have some more ideas now on how to go about helpx despite our busy life. 

 

Thanks Martin for an enjoyable visit!

 

 

 

 



How long does it take to lose oneself? It's just a jump to the left?

That's me right now. Stuck in a time warp. Apparently it takes one week post-party to have regressed to a state of household chaos that very much resembles pre-party house chaos. With the addition of post-party mind-bending, Springsteen tour ending, hormonal panics. And a husband with a very very sore gum.

And how do I feel overall?  I feel rather remarkable.  I've only had to remove 2 items from the kitchen windowsill in a week, that is pretty good going for my compulsive surface covering hubby.  There are no extra do-dabs or non-belonging items on top of the bookcase.  The pantry is a little chaotic, but I'm onto that.  The laundry is getting a bit dodgy, but again, I'm keeping it in check. The kitchen table and kitchen bench are suffering post-party agonies (I can't see either)

On the flip side I have my blackboard, I have my daily quotes on it. The untidy 'hot spot' dumping ground near the stereo is tidy.  The fridge is tidier than it used to be.  The chaos at the moment is within me, but I'm also calmer with this month's hormonal cocktail.

Time is fleeting.

I am feeling a strong sense of that at the moment. That I must make choices that are best for the whole family.

At the moment that doesn't seem to include a trip to Santiago, much as I would LOVE to see Bruce and the E Street Band in concert again on this tour, I think I will miss out, in favour of the following range of alternate activities:

• walking the 5 km (or 10km) part of the local marathon.
• spending 5 days on the Gold Coast in a special 'children-friendly' resort 
• campervanning in the September school holidays
• my daughter's only gymnastics competition this year
• spending some time alone / with other women crafting / crocheting as an 'escape' for me
• visiting my Aunt as she celebrates her 90th birthday
• anything else that seems healing and energising that doesn't cost a small fortune in airfares.

But for now, I'm a bit in the time warp. About to turn 40. Listening to live music as I type that is tonight soothing and quietening the conflicts within.

I met (for the second time) a lovely man today, who hopefully has given me the direction and strength I need to deal with family conflicts. He's certainly given me a large list of things to look after. Who'd have thought a solicitor would be so helpful. Hopefully his charmingly brusque and forthright manner will help see me through the chaos there.

I've put on weight from doing so much Tai Chi and less walking (and lets face it, eating too many jam drops and chocolate cake slices!). I'm sure there is a balance there, but hubby needs to get out and exercise himself. Maybe some of our walks can include the children. I would love that, although its hard to get them all in the one place cooperating!

Have I said anything tonight? Probably not, but

"With a bit of a mind flip, you're into a time slip", so what does it matter?

:)

PS I learnt tonight how to change to a nicer font, yay me for conquering HTML. Also it occurs to me that blink and you miss a whole 7 days. What did you do with this week?  (tramps* don't answer, I know if you're in Europe what you've been up to!)  Blink again and 6 months have gone by.  Morale of the story? Blink infrequently, and make some memories every day.  Today's memories are of my daughters delight at jumping, her kisses of Grandad and the glorious smell of dinner cooking when I arrived home. Tomorrow I will aim for more memories and less chaos.


*aka Bruce Springsteen fans.

Wow, extrinsic motivation central!

Today I'm writing to begin to come to terms with the fact that my motivation is extrinsic. Pretty much all of it. In fact I can't imagine what it must be like to be any other way.

This week has been a rollercoaster. I have spent quite a bit of it preparing my Rainbow Jelly Cups.  Then there are the hours spent agonising over the soon-to-be-over Bruce Springsteen and E-Street Band tour in Europe. I dearly wanted to see it, and have been quite challenged by my initial indecision and ultimate realisation that no, there is no way I will.  Of course now the announcement of Santiago as the next-to-last-stop has me excited all over again.

Closer to home, the great birthday party, combined with the 'best friend visit' sent me into a frenzy of cleaning like I haven't managed in this house in years. Not since before children.  It was really quite something.  The threat of new people in the house, with a short time frame had my frenzy of activity both focussed and effective.  Some things I tidied, others I threw into corners to be sorted later.  But I know where those corners are, I do not intend for the house to get into a state like it has been in the past ever again. 

In fact, for the sake of noting it down, those corners are 1. beside the bed in the family bedroom and 2. hidden in the cupboard in the front room - some reasonbly important papers disappeared into there!

What was the result? A relaxed happy me who felt I'd done what I could, plus the amazing feeling of an uncluttered space. VERY uncluttered compared to just days ago. I am loving it.

I really felt like this party had me pulling together all the things I've been learning about myself this year, I took breaks when I had to, I prioritised what to stress over and I owned my happiness. When guests were arriving and I was cake decorating, I just happily stayed in my happy place, loving the cake decorating moment with my friend Lyn. Everything else was taken care of (once I shoo'ed my hubby into the backyard to supervise children). It was lovely. This is the result of my decorating happy place. The butter cream was not smoothed beautifully. But the cake is for a little person, who isn't going to worry about that!
 

Since then I've also managed to calmly handle the alarming sisterly crisis (a very complex situation) and taken myself for a walk in the rain this evening, reminding me of Irish weather, of Bruce Springsteen in Ireland and of all the fans enjoying this kind of warm soft raining weather at Bruce concerts.

The fun part for me now is two challenges. The first relates to the house - keeping it tidy, keeping on top of my clutterbug husband who I notice has already found a new spot to mess up (the upstairs bathroom that we don't use!!!!). To make sure of this I need to stop blogging very soon and tidy up the room I'm in and the entry.

The second challenge is a new one, but also old. I need to make sure that I make a daily documentation of all the work I do for my Dad as it may be required soon. I write so much down but its something I could do better at, so thats my challenge for this week, beginning with today's trip to take him his special drinks. I was very happy that he enjoyed them and also a 10 minute phone conversation with his beloved sister in law. These moments are precious.

Negativity - cured by an Attitude of Gratitude!

Sometimes, despite the best intentions, life fills up with it. Negativity. Maybe that's just *my* life, I don't know. I'm only living mine, so I've got no way to know if its me in particular.

Right now for instance, despite being extremely grateful earlier, and looking on the bright side, I find myself not only frustrated, but angry.

Because I'm fed up with blogging and still managing to get lost and feel like I'm making no progress, I'm going to go over the gratitude exercise again.

Tonight I'm grateful for the nap I had earlier, it was pleasant. I'm grateful for my Brucebud, Maggie, who understands.  I'm grateful for the time to write birthday invitations, and that I can let go of the perfectionist in me and make do with what I have designed. I'm grateful to the phone repairer who fixed my broken phone. I'm grateful to Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band for the inspiration to move, to make no excuses and to get out there and be fit. I've lost 13 kgs and that will never come back, because I'll never make excuses for myself like that again.  I might even get within 5kgs of my goal weight for my birthday of 80kgs!

I'm grateful for just now remembering to drink water, as it will help make tomorrow a better day. I'm grateful to music, that I'm just about to listen to, while I drink some water, and marvel at how easy it is to turn around a very bad mood and attitude into a relatively pleasant mood and very good attitude.

It seems it is impossible to be angry and grateful at the same time. It seems that when your heart and mind is filled with gratitude, those things and people who make you mad don't matter one zot.

Which is fine by me!

Regaining Happiness - Blogging

This is instalment #3 about the adventure to reclaim the happy calm state from the month of April.

One of the factors contributing to my sense of well-being in the past months has certainly been the act of blogging. I'm fascinated by what makes me tick, by the dynamic that exists that causes me to struggle with expending my energy in sensible ways, and productively.  Blogging helps me to see not only what is happening, but what I'd like to be happening, and finally, I find it incredibly helpful as a tool of reflection, to be able to document the highs and lows, the way I was thinking at a particular time, the repetitive behaviour, a simple reminder of how I'd like to be!

In the past month, my blog posts have decreased from 'most days' to 'most weeks'. I went back to work and so did my husband, leaving so much less time for these quick 15 minute blog updates during the day. The novelty had probably worn off after a honeymoon period, and in addition, I didn't feel like I was doing 'new things' worth blogging about (which wasn't true but it's an interesting reflection on the negativity creeping back into my life!)

Once again, I am shocked and amazed by my tiny bit of internet research. Research indicates that journalling (which is essentially what blogging is) "decreases the symptoms of asthma and rheumatoid arthritis"

Whoa! So without realising it, my blogging has been a contributing factor to the reduction of my arthritic pain. Combined with the gratitude, Bruce and exercise, I've been following a near-perfect disease prevention formula!  How incredible and amazing is that?

So in terms of increasing happiness, and maintaining it, apparently blogging or journalling are right up there with simple ways to get the happiness level higher!

Here are some of the links I have found fascinating to read

Journalling to reduce trauma

Benefits of Journalling

Health Benefits of Journalling

Alongside the health benefits and happiness boosting effect journalling acts as a tool for redirection of my thoughts and therefore my future actions. For example, as soon as I began the blog for the first part of this series of 'reclaiming happiness' I realised that I wanted to contribute smaller daily blogs to help me get back into the swing of blogging.

It looks like blogging and Bruce, exercise and gratitude are going to continue to be part of my daily life, for the sake of my health and sanity.

Regaining Happiness - Exercise

Earlier this week I blogged about needing to regain that happiness from last month. As it turns out exercise is a big deal when it comes  to being happy. And, I discovered last night, so is Tai Chi specifically, so I'll talk a little about both here today.

Exercise
It is amazing how I can be a cursing ranting mess, leave the house for a half hour walk, and return with an incredible sense of calm and peace.  I came to the conclusion that my family vastly prefer the version of me with that sense of peace and calm exuding from within to the alternative grouchy snappy duck!  So the self-fulfilling nature of getting enough exercise means that not only will I feel good, but so will those around me, so then I'll be less irritated by the universe and everyone in the family will be basking in the rays of happiness as they were post-Springsteen. Thats the theory :)

Apparently the practice is much like the theory.  This article says that on any given day, happiness is increased as long as exercise has taken place. Thats the gist of what it says, I'm sure! Quite remarkable. So simple its stupifying.

I have incorporated taking my boy for a walk a few times a week as well. I don't get the distances on those days but he keeps up a sharp pace and the conversation and time talking with him are an incredible payoff.  Plus it gives him the idea that walking with family is a fantastic way to exercise!!!!

This isn't really about the weight loss, but overall my exercise does have that primary purpose, so its worth mentioning that I've reached my target weight of 90kgs and now its time to maintain it at the very least, although I do want to get down another 5kg goal at a time as soon as sickness stops lurking with my husband who can't do without me for a 45 minute walk when he has man-flu!

Tai Chi
I began Tai Chi classes in early 2012, with the Taoist Tai Chi Society.  My Tai Chi lesson of this week is that Tai Chi singlehandedly contributes to my lower blood pressure, my sense of calm, my posture (I literally leave classes taller!) and my attitude.   

I'm not alone.  Tai Chi has been shown to improve circulation, lower high blood pressure, improve balance and posture, and reduce stress.  It also reduces joint pain, increases flexibility and lowers Cholesterol! 

I'm now re-committed to going to Tai Chi at least twice a week to continue to maintain that sense of calm and relaxation, as well as the terrific physical benefits.

Regaining Happiness, starting good habits over again - Gratitude

It has been a challenge fitting in the new routine again since the great week of illness and gastro. Most of the family have come down with a bad cold that is lingering this week also. Money is not where we were expecting it to be and we've been looking with alarm at our budget for next year.  This past week I would have to say I've reverted almost wholly to the way I was before Bruce Springsteen. Which, by comparison to the interim period, isn't a great place, and certainly not where I want to be.

A chat this week with my concert going friend revealed that she was also losing the effect of the excitement, she's been sick too, so who knows whether it's a post-concert high wearing off or it's just about how unwell we're feeling. Regardless, between us we came up with the solution.

Get back to the basics. What made me so happy in the first place?  What was I doing when I was happy? How was I thinking about things, and what things was I thinking about?

The strategy I've used for the past couple of days has four elements. Bruce, Blogging, Gratitude and Exercise.  Between those three things at the forefront, other factors such as being solutions focused, improving my eating habits and sleeping seem to be falling into place as a natural consequence.

Gratitude and Exercise are known to improve life expectancy and quality.  I'd love to see links you come up with about this research, but in the meantime, here is my perspective.

Gratitude

"Being grateful is also associated with improved immune system function, fewer aches and pains, and lower blood pressure"

Wise words to listen to for someone with an autoimmune disease, arthritis and high blood pressure!!!!

Although it seems like such an insignificant thing, being grateful appears to have an uplifting and soothing affect. Simply finding one thing to be glad about this morning seemed to be the salve that calmed my entire day.  The more gratitude, the more excitingly happy I was.  I remember when I was at the dizzy peak of my happiness post-Springsteen and I found joy in every part of the day. I was positively buzzing with gratefulness. Being thankful seems to be the first step  to being very happy indeed.

Plus I think it turns around a bad attitude!  I found this link about how to develop an attitude of gratitude.

I know that today I've been calmer and less bad-tempered since being sent a text first thing this morning with my friend's list of gratefulness, and replying to her with mine. I only had one thing to begin with, I sent her this "I'm grateful that hubby has taken the time to get the boy off to school today"

The rest of my day was calm.